Wee Thread

Mame's daughter, Thread, is suffering from her first heartbreak this weekend.  Little Thread it won't be your last. 

Thread is a mongrel Jewess, almost shiksa, from the Midwest, who could boast of no inheritance, save hearty peddlars and educated scholars all the way back to the Russian pogroms. Despite her material shortcomings, Thread's face reflects all that's beautiful and good in Hebraic and feminine beauty.  A true stunner, and smart as a whip.

Poor Thread fell into the throes of young Yale heartthrob Jason Needle whilst attending Camp Mensa in the Catskills.  Needle, East coast, rich, and Kosher swept our young Thread off her feet.

Enter evil Grandma Phyllis Needle who conspired to make a better (richer) match for Jason, and poison the young lovers. 

So this weekend, Mame is nursing both her box of Franzia and young Thread through her first heartbreak.  My only advice for you dear, little, wee Thread, is take a page outta Elin Nordgren's playbook.  You have no choice but to become a cold hard bitch, who can put food on her table, and a roof over her head, come what may.  

I still believe, and hope you to do too, in Prince Charming and "happily ever after."

Love,
Auntie Babs